Tom is back.
The party is over.
Just kidding. I’m thrilled to have him home again. But this does mean I won’t be sleeping in until 9 most days. During the week I wake up at 6 with Tom and we have breakfast and putter about and at 7:45 I take him to work so that I can have the car during the day.
I am not a morning person. I lie in bed thinking about how much I want to go back to sleep until Tom comes into the room with coffee and breakfast…usually porridge with a banana cut in. I cook every other meal so Tom handles week-day breakfasts. It’s a pretty good set-up, I think.
It also means I will be returning to a regular gym schedule. I haven’t been going to the gym at all since he’s been gone and I say it’s because of my knee, but really it’s more because of laziness. I have done yoga a few times, but not really enough to count as a regular work-out routine.
So, now that he’s back, I’ll be returning to the gym.
We’re heading down to Te Awamutu and Hamilton (the nearby town) later today. Tom’s nana hasn’t been too well lately so Tom really wants to go and see her.
Also, Tom has friends in Hamilton so we’re going to go have dinner with them tonight and sit in their hot tub and drinks beers. Tom’s birthday is the day before mine (thunder-stealer) and it’s the big 4-0. He’s such a quiet and calm person that he says he doesn’t want to do anything for his birthday, and seeing as how I’m virtually dependent on him for $$$$ ’til I get a job, it doesn’t really seem right to spend his money to do something fabulous for his birthday…..as much as I really, really want to.
I can’t believe he’s turning 40. I remember both my parents’ 40th birthdays. We threw a surprise party for my mama and had a big luau at a family friend’s house for my pop’s birthday. And now my man is turning 40.
How time flies, huh?
So, this whole weekend is going to be all about Tom since it’s a big birthday. I am going to try my darndest not to mention my birthday. His family knows my birthday is the day after his but his friends don’t and I want this weekend to be about Tom.
I’m not gonna lie though….it will be very hard for me not to mention my birthday. I love birthdays….especially mine.
But next weekend a friend wants to take Tom and I out for our birthday and I can buy a GD tiara and wear it around if I want to and make it ALL ABOUT ME.
Maybe I’ll make Tom wear a tiara too.
Since I like to educate my dedicated readers (ha ha) I will leave you with a short story and a fact…
When I cook sometimes I put the tablet in the kitchen and watch Jeopardy or something on Netflix but the other day I felt like being smart so I decided to listen to a Ted Talk. You know how Ted Talks have people discussing the autism spectrum and foreign policy and innovative inventions?
Well, I, of course, somehow stumbled upon a gem titled “The Science of the Orgasm” and I learned this fascinating fact….there are people out there who work as pig fluffers.
If you don’t know what a fluffer is, I can’t tell you because that would turn my blog X-rated. But I will say this…it involves porn.
And “pig fluffer” is not actually the official job title, it’s just what I call them.
Anyway, companies that raise pigs discovered that a sow produces a much larger litter of piglets if she is sexually aroused during impregnation. And since the majority of sows are artificially inseminated, there is a person who as to get the sow stimulated before he/she inseminates the pig. The lady giving the talk even showed a video of the “pig fluffer” at work.
It was hilarious.
At one point the guy (covered in plastic-wear from head to boot of course) was straddling the sow backwards and vigorously digging his heels into her sides while jumping up and down just a little bit.
The funniest thing about the video though is they kept zooming in on the guy’s wedding ring. As if to say, “This guy is married and likes humans. There is nothing weird about this. He is not into bestiality.”
Who knows, the wife could just be a beard.
I had these ideas in my head that I should start listening to Ted Talks so I would have more interesting things to talk about with people over dinner and drinks and such.
But I don’t know…starting a conversation with “Y’all ever heard of pig fluffers?” might not go too well.
Anyway, I’m off to go try my hand at making cauliflower “meat”balls. The picture looks delicious….we’ll see how they turn out. If they’re good, maybe I’ll post a picture. If I never mention it again, it’s probably because they turned out to be a big ‘ole failure.
Happy Saturday (or Friday) everyone.