I don’t want to go on and on and on about my weekend…but I will, a little bit. It was just perfect. And kind of surreal. I mean…I was in Marlborough drinking sauvignon blanc. If you’d told me five years ago that I’d be doing that, I never would have believed you. Me? Living in New Zealand? With a BOYFRIEND?!
But there I was and it was awesome. And I got such a kick out of the fact that the vineyards there have sheep moseying about eating the grass. “Free lawn care”, as Tom said. I really love sheep. They’re so roly poly and nervous and they make me laugh when they run…or try to. They especially don’t like it when you slow down the car and “baaah” at them through the window. They get terrified and bump into each other trying to run away. It’s quite funny.
Tom’s friend’s in-laws have a big ole vineyard in Blenheim and a big ole house and a not-so-big-but-perfectly-sized rental apartment where Tom and I stayed. The in-laws are currently over in France for the Tour de France so we had the place to ourselves…plus the use of a Jeep Cherokee to drive around for the weekend.
These people who I’ve never met were super generous and I feel kinda bad because their next electric bill might be a bit high because of me. Sunday night, my last night in Blenheim, Tom couldn’t stay with me. So there I was staying all by myself in a place out in the middle of nowhere surrounded by acres of grapevines and I kept hearing noises downstairs outside the apartment. Most likely it was their dog, a little rat terrier named Boots, who was running freely about (someone came daily to feed him). But in my head it was, of course, murderers. And THEN I was Googling a specific type of dress the book I was reading mentioned because I’d never heard of it before and I was having a hard time picturing it (a dress with detached sleeves). And I shit you not, for absolutely NO reason, amongst the Google images of all sorts of dresses there was, inexplicably, a picture of the scariest most evil looking clown holding a bloody ax. Why?! It had nothing to do with what I’d Googled at all!
And suddenly I just KNEW that was what was making all the noise downstairs.
So I slept with the bathroom light on all night…because that’s how you keep murderous clowns away.
Sorry Mr. & Mrs. K.
Here’s a picture of Tom and I out at Marlborough Sounds on Sunday.
Ain’t we purty though?
One final thought. Did you know that in New Orleans you can hire your own band?! With police escorts??!
Over 20 years I lived in Texas, less than five hundred miles away from Nola, and I’m only finding this out now that I moved over 7,000 miles away?! I’m so sad.
The young guy who worked at one of the wineries we went to mentioned being able to hire a parade in New Orleans. And I said, “Did you hear that from Hannibal Buress?” and he said yes. And I said, “We just learned that from him a few weeks ago too!!”
Tom and I listen to stand-up comedy on Spotify sometimes when we’re on road trips. Hannibal Buress is one of my new favorites.
He tells me about opportunities I have missed.
Although I did do a New Zealand winery tour this last weekend so I shouldn’t be complaining too much.
And there’s always a road trip to Louisiana come Christmas time….
Oh…one more thing. When I walked in the door last night I dropped my suitcase and thought to myself, “It’s good to be home.” And then I smiled because it did actually feel like home.
Night night, everybody.
Don’t let the murder-y clowns get you.