Hello. It’s a beautiful day here. Well…it’s Auckland so really what I should say is, it’s a beautiful day at the moment. I’ve just hung laundry out to dry which means that it will probably get cloudy and rainy at any second now.
I just started Louis Armstrong’s version of La Vie En Rose because I find it to be such a beautiful and calming song and it always kind of gives me goose bumps. When I was small, whenever my dad played Louis I hated it because I thought he had such a terrible voice. But he quickly grew on me and now I absolutely love him.
I took today and tomorrow off of work. I’ve been feeling really overwhelmed lately and I just wanted a few days that weren’t the weekend to take it easy and get myself back in a better head space.
My dad has cancer. He’s got multiple myeloma which is plasma cancer. The doctor caught it pretty early, the treatment has a good success rate, and my dad is in really good health. He and my mom go to the gym every day and eat well and take good care of themselves in general. So all that makes things look positive.
But it still threw me for a bit of a loop of course. I cried for about two days straight and I wanted to fly right home to be with my pops but we all talked about it and decided the best course of action is to think positively and Tom and I will be there in less than four months. Everything will be okay.
Side Note: Tom just got home from work and told me that I am playing Louis (What A Wonderful World is playing now) at a ridiculously high level. He told me blasting Louis like it’s club music is just wrong. He made me turn it down, the buzzkill.
My resident visa is in the works. I keep having to send more and more stuff and it’s such a pain in the butt. I’ve had to send all sorts of ridiculous proof that Tom and I live together. The immigration officer wanted proof of shared utilities, mail sent to Tom and to me and to BOTH of us at our address. I don’t have any of this because I rarely receive mail here and despite his giving me a hard time for blasting jazz music, my boyfriend is pretty darn amazing and pays for all the utilities. So no proof there. I did send a PDF document of our WhatsApp conversation during the time he was deployed. He was gone for over 4 months and we messaged constantly so the document is over 600 pages.
Some of those conversations involve Tom and I attempting to maintain a long-distance love life…the millennials call it sexting. I wasn’t about to read through 600 pages of text to find those conversations so I just sent it and let the immigration officer know there was some unedited content. It was a bit embarrassing and I really hope I don’t get in trouble for it. But I bet if I blacked it out, they’d want to know why and would question the validity of the WhatsApp thread. ‘Cuz you know, those blacked out texts are probably where Tom and I are messaging each other and saying, “Isn’t this funny how this whole thing is a hoax just to get a resident visa?”
Side Note #2: Sittin’ in The Sun is playing now and Louis just sang, “Sittin’ in the sun counting my money, fanned by the summer breeze.” It made me giggle because now I’m thinking about how rappers talk about their money. Louis is the original baller.
My knee isn’t getting any better. Well, that’s not 100% true. It’s gotten better from the giant swollen softball I was hobbling around on a few months ago since I’ve started going to a physical therapist. But I got an MRI last week and the physio looked at the results and said, “Let’s see what the specialist says, but you’ve got extreme cartilage and bone damage and I think you’re looking at surgery.” She told me she believes, though she’s not absolutely certain, that my knee is like it is because I never did physical therapy after my last surgery. So I’ve been walking wrong on my leg for over a year now and putting weight and stress on my joints in the wrong places. So now my knee is worse. I knew that surgeon I went to was a fucking hack; he never did ANY sort of follow-up after the surgery. Excuse my language, but I think it’s pretty deserved.
I go to see the orthopedic surgeon tomorrow to get his assessment of things. I just want my knee to be fixed! I can’t walk up stairs anymore without using the railing to haul myself up, and going down the stairs is never a quick feat. I can’t jump, I can’t run, and sometimes I can’t even walk that well. It’s really frustrating. Especially since I’ve already spent $5,000 to fix the darn knee!!
I just put on La Vie En Rose again because writing about this stuff is making me pissy.
And the last thing that stinks? Tom’s going away AGAIN. He leaves in just over a week and he’ll be gone for over 6 weeks. Six weeks is a hell of a lot better than 4+ months but I’m still not happy about it. I’ve already had a big tantrum about it, and gotten mad at Tom (which is pretty irrational because it’s not his choice to go) so now I’m just trying to be okay about it. He’ll be back before I know it and with a nice little chunk of bonus cash to throw into our Texas vacation account.
So that’s life in a nutshell right now.
It’s not all bad. Spring is coming. And Tom still makes me laugh on a regular basis. And I have a second box of Hot Tamales, sent by my mom from Texas via Rachel. Did I mention that Rachel had a piano tour in the U.S. and played one night in Austin and my parents went to see her? Well they did, and my mom sent her home with two boxes of Hot Tamales. I’m not usually a candy person but I will shove those deliciously spicy cinnamon-flavored treats into my mouth by the handful. Tom hid the boxes from me so that I wouldn’t plow through them immediately. He didn’t ACTUALLY hide them, he placed them down against an inside leg of his desk. I ate one box in what I believe to have been a very tasteful pace. The other one stayed out of sight.
A few days ago Tom said, “Hey Leah, you know what you forgot about?” and I said, “What?” and he said, “Guess,” and I said, “WHAT?!” and he said, “What’s down here by my feet that you forgot about?” I gasped in excitement and then I collected myself and said, “Oh, yeah, I knew they were there.” Tom said “Buuuuullshiiiiit. If you remembered they were there they would have been gone yesterday.” To which I replied indignantly, “Tom, I am an ADULT. I was exercising will power.” To which Tom once again replied, “Buuuuulllshiiiit.”
To prove him wrong, and show him just how much will power I have, I have made that box of Hot Tamales last almost two days. I’m extremely proud of myself.
Guess what I’m doing now??
Not the best picture of me but it’s really hard to get a good picture of yourself cramming candy into your mouth.
I’m gonna go lie on the couch and read my fantasy book for a while and eat the rest of these candies.
Dammit….Tom just got out of the shower. Now I have to share.