The other night I was making Tom and I a fancy ramen dinner with homemade vegetarian dashi broth, and shiitakes, pan-friend crispy tofu…the works. It took a long time to make and wasn’t all that delicious. In fact, I’d go so far as to say I might enjoy the 2-minute instant noodles from a package more than I enjoyed that dinner.
Anyway, as I was stirring the broth I kept thinking Tomorrow I intend to wake up rich. I was looking into the pot and thinking this thought over and over and from the other room Tom kept yelling, “Don’t forget to infuse the food with sexy dreams for me!”
I may have forgotten to do that part.
Either way, the food wholly failed at what it was supposed to do. Despite my careful meditations, I did not wake up rich the next morning.
So, last night, while cooking garlicky kale pasta, I kept thinking These noodles will make my knee healthier. In the morning I will wake up and my knee won’t hurt.
I thought this was maybe a more realistic intention to fuse into the food. But it didn’t work either.
Maybe I’m just doing it wrong.
I’m also not a Buddhist monk who has studied under the Dalai Lama so I’ve got that working against me. Plus, Tom’s continued desire to have x-rated dreams was breaking my concentration since he kept asking me if I was trying to infuse the food with things that would benefit him.
So, what the hell am I talking about?
The company, Intentional Chocolate, was started in 2007 by Jim Walsh. He invented an electrical device into which a person can embed an intention through silent meditation. Memory chips in the machine capture and store the physical correlates of that person’s meditated intentions. I didn’t even realize there were physical correlates to meditation, but again, I’m no Buddhist monk. Once the intentions are ready, the machine is places inside a special room for several days where it broadcasts the recorded intention into several hundred pounds of chocolate.
For a mere 40 bucks, you can get a bag of chocolate that is “scientifically proven to invigorate and heighten a person’s sense of well-being”.
Each of these “embedded” chocolate pieces includes this intention:
Whoever consumes this chocolate will manifest optimal health and functioning at physical, emotional and mental levels, and in particular will enjoy an increased sense of energy, vigor and well-being for the benefit of all beings.
So maybe my attempts at giving Tom wet dreams and making myself rich just aren’t the RIGHT type of intention. Too small-minded and self-benefiting perhaps? Or maybe the embedding didn’t work because I didn’t use chocolate and I don’t have this special electrical device that can capture my meditative thoughts.
I will simply have to go out and buy lots and lots of chocolate and try harder.
This is certainly an experiment I’m way more interested in partaking in as opposed to drinking my own pee.