I don’t want to go on and on and on about my weekend…but I will, a little bit. It was just perfect. And kind of surreal. I mean…I was in Marlborough drinking sauvignon blanc. If you’d told me five years ago that I’d be doing that, I never would have believed you. Me? In New Zealand? With a BOYFRIEND?
But there I was. It was awesome. And I got such a kick out of the fact that the vineyards there have sheep moseying about eating the grass. “Free lawncare”, as Tom said. I really love sheep. They’re so roly poly and nervous and they make me laugh when they run…or try to. They especially don’t like it when you slow down the car and baaah at them through the window. They get terrified and bump into each other trying to run away. It’s quite funny.
Tom’s friend’s in-laws have a big ole vineyard in Blenheim and a big ole house and a not-so-big-but-perfectly-sized rental apartment where Tom and I stayed. The in-laws are currently over in France for the Tour de France so we had the place to ourselves…plus the use of a Jeep Cherokee to drive around for the weekend. It was so generous of them. The Jeep threw me for a bit of loop because the windshield wiper controls and the turn indicator thingy (??) were switched around so I was back to turning on the windshield wipers every time I took a turn or changed lanes. But still, I managed to drive an unfamiliar car in an unfamiliar place and I did great!!
I’m slowly becoming a Kiwi.
I feel kinda bad though because the in-laws’ electricity bill might be a bit high. Sunday night Tom couldn’t stay with me. So there I was staying all by myself in a place out in the middle of nowhere surrounded by acres of grapevines and I kept hearing noises downstairs outside the apartment. Most likely it was their dog, a little rat terrier named Boots, who was running freely about (someone came daily to feed him). But in my head it was, of course, murderers. And THEN I was Googling a specific type of dress that the book I was reading mentioned, and I shit you not, for absolutely NO reason, amongst images of all sorts of dresses there was, inexplicably, a picture of the scariest most evil looking clown holding a bloody axe. Why?! It had nothing to do with what I’d Googled at all! And suddenly I just KNEW that was what was making all the noise downstairs.
So I slept with the bathroom light on all night…because that’s how you keep murderous clowns away.
Sorry Mr. & Mrs. K.
Here’s a picture of Tom and I out at Marlborough Sounds on Sunday.
Ain’t we purty though?
One final thought. Did you know that in New Orleans you can hire your own band?! With police escorts??!
Over 20 years I lived in Texas, less than five hundred miles away from Nola, and I’m only finding this out now that I moved over 7,000 miles away?! I’m so sad.
The young guy at one of the wineries we went to mentioned being able to hire a parade in New Orleans. And I said, “Did you hear that from Hannibal Buress?” and he said yes. And I said, “We just learned that from him a few weeks ago too!!”
Tom and I listen to stand-up comedy on Spotify sometimes when we’re on roadtrips. Hannibal Buress is one of my new favorites.
He tells me about opportunities I have missed.
Although I did do a New Zealand winery tour this last weekend so I shouldn’t be complaining too much.
And there’s always a roadtrip to Louisiana come Christmas time….
Oh…one more thing. When I walked in the door last night I dropped my suitcase and thought to myself, “It’s good to be home.” And then I smiled because it did actually feel like home.
Night night, everybody.
Don’t let the murdery clowns get you.